24 on 24th

24th March. A date that no matter what will always be my favourite. This year's date is no different. In fact its slightly significant for me. Its the year I turn 24. If you've been around me long enough, you'll know what turning 24 is important for me.

I've been through my share of ups and downs over the years. This time, for the first time, I'm celebrating away from home and loved ones. I honestly never thought I'd be in this situation. Never planned to fly to Australia to study. For many months I pondered if I made the right choice. And for many months I thought it was the wrong one. Of late, I think it was the best decision I made at that point of time. This major move has taught me many things. Allowed me to learn more about life and myself. Made me appreciate the things I used to over look back in KL. Most importantly, I've learned that I've grown. I take care of myself better. I study (significantly more than I did in KL). I learn. I understand. I appreciate.

I might have still learnt all this if I stayed in KL. Probably later on. I might not even realize them ever. Life is unpredictable. We can plan for the best. Everything will unfold itself with time.

I lost my train of thought somewhere between there and here. So I guess I'll just make a short ending. It has been a great 24 year. The things I've done. People I've got to know. Places I've been. I appreciate them all. Here's to many many returns.

Happy birthday Raja Aliff.

Sights & Sounds

Been a while.

Decipher me.

Footnotes.

It has been ages since I last updated this blog. I particularly blame this on Twitter. I has enabled me to express my thoughts in an easier way. So I'm not even sure if anyone will actually be reading this post. Looking back at things, its already been a year. Time really really just swiftly passes by nowadays. December of 2008 is very much still fresh in my memory. Amazing. Just 12 months later.

With new year approaching, its usually time to reflect on the year. I have to say it has been a rather big year for me. With 2010 being the year of the Tiger, I'm really hoping for even bigger things in the year to come. I've never made resolution or the sorts. I'm not starting to either. I will however still keep on moving and improving myself. Enjoy and savour this precious life. '

One step at a time.

Merry Christmas and have a great New Year.

=)

Letters to me.

Raindrops tapping softly on my window

Cold, silent breeze passing through

Serene, blissful silence

I smiled to myself.

Theres something about the rain

Greetings old friend

Out of reach

Lately I've been hard to reach

I've been too long on my own

Everybody has a private world

Where they can be alone

Are you calling me?

Are you trying to get through?

Are you reaching out for me?

Like I'm reaching out for you?

Peeking throught the blinds

Since coming to Sydney, I haven't been updating as much as I wanted to. Its not that I don't have things running through my mind anymore, its more that I can't find a way to put the into words anymore. Coming here has indeed taught me a lot of things. Especially regarding myself. Which is good, since part of coming here is for me to, how to say, have a bit of soul searching for myself.

I was heading down a good, smooth road. Until I ruined it for myself. Always with the same reason; love. It is the single most distracting matter that can turn my life upside down, inside out. I literally just lost my bearing. Only a handful of people know whats really happening.

I guess pretty much for some of the matters, I have to do what I have to do. lets just hope it turns out right.

Eid Mubarak

Selamat Hari Raya everyone =)

Missing everyone back home. See you guys soon.

Take care and be safe on the roads. Maaf zahir dan batin.

Exogenesis

Life's been quite the rollercoaster lately. Emotionally of course. Not to mention the countless things thats always on my mind.

"Its like you can smell the food, but you can't touch the silverware."

Here's to you

Sitting here, hours after hearing the news. I still find it hard to accept that you're not here with us anymore. I shivered upon hearing the news. It can't be, I told myself. I am still telling myself that. No word can explain how much you mean to us. To me. You were the bravest, strongest person I know. Always prayed for your health and happiness. Will still pray for you now. You were such a great friend. I will miss you, and all the good times we had. Now I'm left with a promise I can't fulfill. I still owe you your birthday lunch =') God bless you Alia. We'll miss you. Al Fatihah.

21 past 5.

You wonder who does. If only you knew that I actually do.

Fusion

After meeting the GT-R for a few times, I finally got to have a ride in it. To make the experience even better, R mode was on for all 3 setups. Hehehe. Being a car enthusiast, I've always wondered how exactly does it feel to accelerate under 5 seconds? Because the fastest car I've ever driver is my dad's 525i or my mom's CLK 230K. Which is already fast to begin with. So nothing ever prepared me for this experience.

The moment Alex started the car, my heart just stopped. I just sit in awe and listen to the V6 roar. We backed out of the driveway. I clicked in the seatbelt, eager for the journey to begin. "I'll have to wait till the transmission is up to temperature, so we won't be going so fast yet." Alex told us. I guess slow isn't really a vocab you have when you're driving such a car. He floored the pedal, and we were speeding through the neighbourhood. That single moment answered my earlier question. Now I know how it feels to accelerate under 5 seconds. Intersection after intersection passed firghteningly fast. Before I knew it, The Royal National Park.

Its the nearest thing I can imagine to be the Norderschlief. Twisting, winding roads. Small, tight lanes, Lined with trees and greeneries. Alex looked to his dash, and flicked 3 switches. 3 R's now light up on the dash. He wasted no time and floored the car. The sensation was unexplainable. Everything was just a blur. I only focused on the road ahead.

Turn after turn, my mind recalls back all the reviews I've read and saw regarding the GT-R. And now I finally understand what the articles were trying to say. At that moment, it could have only been any better if I were in the driver's seat. But my day has yet to come. For now, I'll just enjoy that day. Till a better one comes.

p.s. I have always wondered to myself who would need a 4 blade shaver? Because I've always thought the 3 blade ones were already good. Till today happened. I got myself a 5 blade shaver. The gadgetier in me just couldn't resist. Probably try them out tomorrow. =D

New Sunshine

First of all, I'd like to apologise for the very very long delay in updating. The past 5 to 6 weeks have been hectic for me. So now, I'm finally settled down to actually update about things. Overall, I'm slowly fitting into the lifestyle. Kind of hard to adapt as for the past 23 years of my life being in Malaysia and the past 6 years as a growing adult in Kuala Lumpur, with the past 6 months spent with friends at mamaks and various eateries spending time away. Here, everything is closed by 6pm. Except for maybe pubs. Practically I end up with nothing to do after 6pm.

Before I had my internet it was practically hell. Just staying in with nothing to do. Which leads to me hitting the sack at 10pm. Yes, thats 8pm back in kl, from what I remember is the time we're just about to go for dinner or just simply busy doing nothing. Amazingly I wake up at 7am everyday. Without fail. I guess I'm still not comfortable with this.

I guess I'll leave this for now and update more late on. With pics from before departure.

Later on.

Adjusting.

All's well so far. Settling matters one at a time. 

 

Intimidating. 

D-Day

Its been hectic. I'm not sure if I'm ready for this.

Here goes nothing.

Framed Visions

In the stillness of the night. Lonesome. Calm and cooling.

I take a deep breath, thinking about things. "I shouldn't be thinking about this." I told myself.

Yet it keeps on playing on like a broken record. I can only sigh. 

I looked around my room. I then realized that I've been living in this room, my own little sanctuary, for a little more than 9 years. Feels much shorter than that to be honest. So much memories. I can still remember my first night in this room. Feels like yesterday. One thing I'll miss more is my car. My companion for the past 4 years. My best friend so to speak. All the late nights, early mornings. Road trips, friends, family. My batmobile. Gen2 Merah Membara, Ja said. Haha.

Speaking of good times made me realize that everything and everyone, has a special place in my life. My weird little hobbies. Makes me smile every single time. 

Its time to go.

Update.

Decided to change the blog's layout. The polkas been there since... God knows how long. New layout is just the standard template. But it's minimalist. And also dark. 

Enjoice. Lul.

Untitled #2

Have you ever wondered what is it like to look back at your teenage life, more precisely teenage love life when you are older? I know I have. It seems kind of surreal to me to be honest. All our lives, as teenagers, not being able to be with someone is usually because the other person is with somebody else or they simply don't want to be with another person. When a relationship ends, it is usually the end of the story or sometimes the ending of the emotion towards each other. 

As I've gotten older, especially of late, it got me thinking. What if I'm in love with someone who's getting married? What if the love of my life died? What will happen to me? Does one simply move on and get along with life like in the earlier stages of his life? Or should one stay and devote to the feelings they hold dear to them? 

I can't give you my answer. Because simply, I don't know what my answer is. I've had my older friends share with me their life. One told me that she once bumped into an old love. Only to find out that he doesn't even remember who she is. Even though married, she explained that old memories of significant people in our lives tend to stay, for her side at least. Can you imagine that? Bumping into someone who to you is significant to your life only to find out that the other person doesn't even remember who you are?

I've recently got to know about my father's friend, who is married, but is having an affair. Suprisingly, its with his old high school sweetheart.  So I thought to myself. What if one day, after marriage, I still have feelings for old flames? To those that know me well enough will know that I'm not one to have feelings towards multiple people. But what if you can't have the one that means the most? Only to have a chance with them later in time? I find it very hard to decide if I were to be put into that situation, especially I've always said that I only want one woman in my life. So really, is there right or wrong in this? Follow the heart or follow the brain? Logic versus emotions. 

Then again, I might just be thinking too much. All these late nights doing nothing has put my brain into overdrive with these random thoughts. I guess I shall leave these thoughts here for the moment, and ponder upon another matter. 

Until then.

New Look.